An Ultimate Beginners Guide to Vibrators and Their Best Uses

Photo by Make Love Not War used with permission

Shopping for a sex toy can be fun and exciting, but it can also be overwhelming. There are so many options on the market today, it can be difficult to decide just which one to choose. Thinking back, a vibrator was the first sex toy I was ever gifted, so a beginners guide to vibrators seemed like the perfect choice to break down.

The Classic Vibrator

The first vibrator I owned was a classic vibrator. My girlfriend at the time sold sex toys and gifted it to me. Back then, there weren’t a lot of options, especially compared to today. It was leopard print and took D batteries! It was hefty, unwieldy, and bulky.

These vibrators are long, perfectly straight, and typically comprised of a hard ABS plastic exterior. Kind of ouchy if you’re not careful. But, being so simple and cheap relative to other vibrators, it is a perfect starting point for those just starting to explore vibrator play. A classic vibrator like this is sold in novelty stores more often than not, but it’s still a valid choice and if you want penetration, it works.

Photo by Lovehoney used with permission

Super Smoothie Classic

For those who are new to vibrators in general, here are a few tips to get you started:

  • Use your other hand to stimulate other parts of your body to complement the vibrator.
  • Change vibrator intensities and angles periodically.
  • Take your time and don’t use high-intensities just to orgasm quickly.
  • Once comfortable with the classic vibrator, you can move on to the more sophisticated vibrator types.

The Rabbit Vibrator

Most experts agree that the rabbit vibrator is the best vibrator for women, hands down. But just why is that the case? Although I can orgasm from penetration alone, most women can not and need clitoral stimulation. A rabbit vibrator provides the ability for users to get dual stimulation which can potentially give you a blended orgasm. What’s not to love about that?

For most women, getting off effectively is a matter of stimulating multiple regions at once. Most commonly, this means vaginal stimulation and clitoral stimulation. The original rabbit vibrator made that possible by adding a set of “rabbit ears” towards the base end of a vibrator.

These rabbit ears were designed to stimulate the clitoris while the bulk of the vibrator is inserted vaginally. Today, vibrator designs have evolved to the point where many rabbit vibrators don’t have rabbit ears anymore. As long as a vibrator has these 3 defining characteristics, consumers consider it a rabbit:

  • A longer end to be inserted vaginally for internal stimulation.
  • A shorter end to stimulate the clitoris externally.
  • The ability for both ends to be used simultaneously.

A rabbit vibrator frees up your second hand to use elsewhere such as your nipples or breasts, or even your anus. In this case, a rabbit vibrator allows you to take your pleasure up one more notch!

Photo by Fun Factory used with permission

Lady Bi Rabbit Vibrator

The Mini (Bullet) Vibrator

No beginners guide to vibrators would be complete without a discussion about bullet vibrators. It’s a very common vibrator used by many, called a bullet due to their shape. Not all mini vibrators are bullets but most bullets are mini. What makes this category of vibrators so great comes down to 3 key reasons:

1. Portable and discrete enough to take anywhere– Mini vibrators are called such for an obvious reason–they are small. While other vibrators are typically 6 inches long, mini vibrators are always smaller, ranging anywhere from 3 to 5 inches. Mini vibrators are the perfect vibrators to take on the go. It will fit nicely in any purse, or even right in your pocket if necessary. Not only that, but the look of a mini vibrator is a lot subtler than a regular vibrator, allowing it to blend in with the rest of your belongings. Some companies even design them to look like a tube of lipstick!

2. Quiet enough to avoid detection– A big problem with using a vibrator outside your home isn’t just taking it to places other than your bedroom, but also avoiding detection from those around you while using it. Luckily, the mini vibrator is perfectly equipped for that. Most mini vibrators only make as much sound as a soft whisper.

3. Simple and intuitive to use– It gives you all the benefits of a classic vibrator in a much smaller variety– and typically just one button to cycle through various vibration speeds. With no protruding elements, you don’t have to worry about getting the right angle or orientation for proper usage.

Maya by LNW photo used with permission

Maya Bullet

The G-Spot Vibrator

Even though you may know exactly where your g-spot is, unfortunately this doesn’t guarantee you can effectively stimulate it manually. It isn’t the easiest spot to reach but no worries, a great g-spot vibrator can help you get there.

Everyone’s body is different, so if your g-spot is located farther up along the anterior vaginal wall, and/or your fingers are simply short, then it may not be physically possible to reach your g-spot on your own. Also, you may not have the strength to apply ample pressure to your g-spot from such an awkward angle. For me, pressure is key so using a toy or having a partner stimulate my g-spot is the only thing that works for me.

Although the g-spot is a highly sensitive region just like the clitoris is, you do have to apply slightly more pressure to truly stimulate it. Unlike your clitoris, where someone could literally blow on it and you will feel a faint pleasing sensation, you must press down on your g-spot very well to activate the pleasure sensations in that region. So why include g-spot stimulators in a beginners guide to vibrators? Even though stimulating this area might be considered a more advanced technique than manual masturbation, the benefits are well worth the effort and made much easier with the use of a vibrator.

From a purely physical standpoint, using a g-spot vibrator gives you much more leverage to not just hit your g-spot, but to hit it effectively. The curved or emphasized vibrator head, which is the defining feature of the g-spot vibrator, plays a very important role. This unique shape targets your g-spot–some models even incorporate a thumping motion within the head that taps your g-spot, making it even more effective. Others are self-propelled or thrusters that do all the work for you.

Photo by Author

Nanci Prime Thruster (pre-configured model only comes with thruster)

The Egg Vibrator

Most people think of an egg vibrator as something just a few inches in length and shaped like, you guessed it, an egg. The cool thing about egg vibrators is, not only can you take it wherever you go, you can use it just about anywhere as well. They’re typically even smaller than a bullet or mini vibrator. Even cooler, and the biggest reason I had to include it in a beginners guide to vibrators is, most of these on the market today are controllable by a mobile app! You can hand over control to your partner in a public or private setting which can lead to some spicy fun.

The rounded (or oval) egg shape means you can fully insert the vibrator into your vagina without it slipping out. Or if the egg vibrator is designed to be placed against your vulva inside your underwear, the non-phallic shape allows for a more comfortable and less noticeable fit. Once your egg vibrator is firmly in place, you can handle the rest through a separate remote control. This adds to the discrete nature of the device as well, as using a remote-control is infinitely subtler than having to reach under your clothing to change vibrator frequencies or intensities.

Photo by Lovehoney used with permission

We-Vibe Jive App Controlled Egg Vibrator

The Wand Vibrator

Everyone that owns sex toys should own a good wand so there’s no way I was going to leave them out of a beginners guide to vibrators. In fact, I would go so far as to say no sex toy collection is complete without one, regardless of your level of experience. Wands look almost identical to a typical personal massage device that is used for back pain and other ailments–in fact, the most famous of these vibrators started out its life for that exact purpose.

Wands consist of a uniform rod with a large soft, semi-flexible head at the end. This obviously means it is fairly useless when it comes to vaginal penetration, but that’s not what they’re designed to do. But hey, there are attachments you can purchase from many manufacturers to add to the head that will allow for penetration.

The Clitoral (Oral Sex) Vibrator

Unlike most vibrators, a clitoral vibrator’s main attachment is an open-ended tip at the end of the shaft of the device. This open end is maybe only an inch or so in diameter, perfect for using on your small, but highly sensitive clitoris. Instead of focusing on vibrations in general, this vibrator literally aims to suck or pulsate on your clitoris. Just like how (most) people give oral sex!

The different levels of pleasure are directly related to the intensity level you are using. At lower intensities, it will feel more like playful foreplay–as if someone were trying to take as long as possible to get you to orgasm. However, at higher intensities, you can orgasm right away, just like with using a wand vibrator at the highest setting. The best way to use your clitoral vibrator though, is to find a setting somewhere in the middle.

Pro Tip — make sure your vibrator is sealed tight! Using a drop of lube on your clitoris helps maintain your seal.

This is very important to ensure that you are stimulated the way the device was intended. Without the vibrator tip being completely sealed off, the suction won’t have as much effect, if any at all. To make sure you are using your clitoral vibrator properly, you may need to practice a few times at first. I found, using a mirror can be useful to get things lined up just right, especially if your anatomy is shaped like mine. I have meatier bits so at times, moving my outer lips out of the way and getting to my clit can be difficult.

The Bottom Line on a Beginners Guide to Vibrators

While most people knowingly associate the vibrator with amazing sexual pleasure, different vibrators can provide vastly different sensations. Each of these highlighted seven vibrator types have their own unique attributes that make them a staple of anyone’s sex toy collection. Even if you have a personal preference as to your favorite vibrator type (I’ll never not own a wand), don’t limit yourself to just that vibrator. Your body can become used to the same vibrations and movements and potentially cause issues achieving orgasm during sex–and during solo play. Try a few different vibrators and mix it up. You’ll experience pleasure in no time.

*This article contains affiliate links. Not only will you get quality products, you’ll also help support my writing. If you’d like to set up a time to consult with me about which products may work best for you, get in touch at demeterdelune@gmail.com

The Best Sex Blanket I’ve Ever Owned as a Squirter

Image by The Layer, used with permission https://getthelayer.com/

Sex can get messy, especially when one partner is a squirter and a sex blanket can fix that with ease. I can’t tell you how many sets of sheets, mattress covers, and mattresses, among other things, I ruined before I finally found ways to protect the surfaces I have sex on. One of the first items I was introduced to was a simple medical item, a washable chux pad. They were placed on the bed when I had my children, but I never considered using them during sex. Fairly inexpensive and washable, but they’re not exactly pretty. If you’re using them with your regular partner, you may care more about function than fashion, but if you want something that’s a little prettier and more discreet, I’ve found something that works just as well to fit the bill.

So, What to Do? Get a Sex Blanket!

Recently, the makers of The Layer reached out and asked if I would be interested in trying their product. The Layer is a woman owned and operated company, and their product is made in the USA. Just like a chux pad, The Layer lays on top of your sheets and under you when you’re ready to have some adult fun, and nothing gets through! It’s also the perfect size and shape to put on the couch, or anywhere you’re having fun. It’s round, so no worries about which way you place it! It’s always the right way. One side is luxurious soft, organic cotton fleece, the other is waterproof magic. It’s not noisy, we’ll leave the sounds up to you. It absorbs all sexy-time messes, even menstrual blood. Because it’s not white, like chux pads, there’s no worry of stains showing. It’s a sex blanket but it’s functional for all sorts of things not related to sex as well and I always love a multi-use product.

The Layer is super thin and 40 inches in diameter, so it fits easily in a night table, an overnight bag, or even in your glove compartment. They also sell an attractive clutch for discretion and cleanliness, perfect for that hot date. It’s been tested to withstand over 300 washings and is 100 percent eco-friendly. You can machine or hand wash in warm water, no bleach, no fabric softener, and medium tumble dry.

My review is mentioned in this podcast <3

Real World Experience With This Awesome Sex Blanket

It’s all well and good for a company to tell you how well this sex blanket works, but using it in the real world is what we really want. I’m a prolific squirter and I love using lube. My husband also thinks it’s great to make me squirt as much as humanly possible. In fact, I believe he’s made it his life’s goal to dehydrate me every single time we have sex. As I’m sure you’ve heard, no one wants to sleep in the wet spot. It’s cold, it’s uncomfortable, and it sucks.

The day we received The Layer in the mail, we knew we’d be trying it out that night. I couldn’t believe how thin it was and honestly, wasn’t sure how much liquid it would hold. I’ve soaked through chux pads before, so I was a bit leery this thin sex blanket would handle what I could dish out. But I was definitely willing to try. I told the hubby ahead of time he was free to attempt to make as much of a mess as he wanted. Because we’ve definitely had to have conversations before about holding back to keep the mess down, which sucks! But in our current living situation, only being able to do laundry on a limited basis and owning two sets of sheets, we’ve got to be careful.

Getting Down to Business

So we broke out the lube and some toys and got busy. Really busy. I was concerned The Layer may not be wide enough to accommodate everything we got into. We were all over the place! But we managed to stay on the blanket for the most part, and when we didn’t, we weren’t making too much of a mess. We used our current favorite sex oil, Foria’s Intimacy Sex Oil with CBD, which typically doesn’t stain anyway and definitely didn’t show on The Layer. After a couple of hours of intense, super wet play, it was time to see if this sex blanket lived up to its promises.

I slowly pulled it down to the end of the bed, almost expecting to see at least a tiny bit of moisture underneath. Much to my delight and surprise, the sheets were bone dry! The Layer totally lived up to the hype and kept every bit of liquid ensconced in it’s comfy fibers where it belongs. No one slept in the wet spot that night, and they’ll never have to again.

Final Thoughts

We love The Layer and know you will too. If you go to their website, and sign up for their newsletter, you’ll get a code for 10 percent off your order immediately. This isn’t an affiliate link, but I was given my Layer in exchange for my honest review. I recommend it to anyone who wants to keep the surfaces where they have sex clean and dry.

Although The Layer links aren’t affiliate links, there are affiliate links contained in this article, so not only will you get a quality product, you’ll help support my writing.